Heard, Said, and Seen in the Field

Things heard, said, or seen while I was on survey today (all of these are true):

Said:
in child's voice - Mommy, what's that?
in mother's voice - That's a crack dealer, honey. Give him a piece of candy and he'll do a trick!


Seen:
A refrigerator, lying on its back in an open field, with upwards of twenty bullet holes in it.

...and a bit later, in a drainage, an electric stove top with multiple bullet holes in it.


Heard:
"Listen buster, it takes more than words to hurt a hard-boiled dame!"


Said: ...well, actually, sang:

It's Springtime
For Survey
In Kern County
Play with
the meth-heads
on break


Heard:

Field Tech 1 - "So, we gave her" (indicates another field tech) "a new nickname."

Field Tech 2 - "Yeah, we're calling her 'pebbels' now."

Me - "Why pebbles?"

Field Tech 1 - "Well, she was taking a nap during break, and wearing the hard hat...so, we decided to pick up gravel and try our aim..."



Heard:

"We should totally see what kind of connections we have, and try to get an opera about archaeological surveys written and produced. The whole thing could be people counting out transect spacing, and occasionally shouting that they've found a Clovis point."


Said: ...or. once again, actually, sang...

Got to get the survey done
Survey done
Then collect the check with
My per diem
Wanna drink some wine and rum
'til I'm dumb
Buy it with a little of my per diem




In Conclusions: When working in Kern County, you have to make your own fun.